The following is the first part of a paper called "my heart right now in one page" that I sent to the staff and elders this week. I will divide it into three installments over the next several days...here's part one:
Over the last nine days, I have had the opportunity to hear nine sermons, three devotions, two intensive leadership presentations, and two days of vision casting conversation with the elder team. These have been accompanied with some great meal conversations, daily quiet times and at least four occasions of corporate musical worship. My heart is full. There is no way to describe the spiritual place I'm in right now in complete detail; but I can tell you that there are some major themes that the Spirit has laid on my heart with one or all of the experiences listed above.
First, I'll begin by saying that I want to be a dangerous pastor leading a dangerous church. Not dangerous in a stay-away kind of way (as you would a lion in the wild), but dangerous in a power-greater-than-me awareness (like someone handling explosives). I'm sure this scares some who think I'm already wild-eyed in my approach to ministry, but I want to have the kind of ridiculous faith that only a true disciple of Jesus could have. I want to preach dangerous sermons that deeply offend while they simultaneously attract. Honestly, I want to be a martyr and I don't even know what that truly means or how that is played out. I just want to have one eternal conversation with an apostle that ends with "me too". I want to give a crazy amount of stuff away and learn not to love it any more. I want to be a catalyst for a revolution of extraordinary giving, serving, and evangelizing. And I want to boldly challenge thousands of people to do the same. I'm short of this by far I fear...but this is what my heart feels. The passage from Acts 5:11-16 describes in a biblical way the kind of church I want to lead.
More to come...